How to Kill What You Feel

I have killed feelings before

Either because they are too wrong..

Or too right.

Now I will do the same mutiny

That has caused the downfall

Of perfect love stories -

Forget and pretend.

To forget the music..

For when I hear it over and over again, it pains me.

And pretend that it is just pure coincidence that it reminds me of one moment.

To forget the moment..

For when I replay that scene over and over again on my mind, it hurts me.

And pretend that it was just like the smile of all others that smiled at me, though uncountless.

To forget the smile..

For when I recall it, it aches my heart.

And pretend that it was but human to relate your smile to that weird feeling.

To forget that feelings..

For when it ensnares my whole being, I’m helpless.

And pretend that I have felt this way before either to my dead dog or to one more person from eons ago.

To forget the person..

For when I feel his presence

Or recall his smile

Or remember the moment

Or hear the music,

he’s the only one I could ever think of.

And pretend he had never existed in this lifetime.